Just when I thought I was out of things to vent about, everyday sexism strikes again.
Our professor was telling us a story about his wife, and joked that if you ever wanted to a win an argument, not to marry an attorney. "I can't win," he told us, "I'll say, 'Just tell me how to feel so we can move on!'". A boy in the second row called out, "Isn't that how fights with women always go?"
Just like that. Half the class hoots, some, like me, shoot silent glares, other just wait for a response.
The professor handled it in the most beautiful way I could've hoped. "I've only ever been married to a woman," he told us, "so I can't really say from experience, but I don't think it's a gender thing."
There are a lot of things I hate about the sexism from the second row. Firstly and obviously, it's incredibly sexist. It's degrading and offensive. Secondly and indirectly, it feels like gaslighting.
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse where one partner tries to manipulate another's perceptions of reality, or make them doubt their own sanity. I know, the connection is a stretch, but as someone who's been through it, it's a little too familiar. Have you ever heard a guy try to end an argument by telling a girl she's just "acting crazy"? Asking, "Jeez, are you on your period or something? Or in this case, dismissing a woman by generalizing her as bossy and nagging.
Stop. Stop doing this. Stop generalizing, stop accusing.